A parenting question?

my little girl who is 8 years old and her brother age 10 went with their grandmother to get their hair cut my girl is mature for her age she is in the mirror all the time and changes her hair regularly trying to find a look she likes we agreed that she wanted her hair to stay long and for her bangs to grow so she can comb them back the woman who cut her hair took off alot of it and my husbands mother brought t he kids home and my little girl was crying i tried to convince her that she looked wonderful but deep inside i was boiling because they never listen when she tells them how she wants her hair i think she is old enough to be able to decide the stylist said she had to trim the nats out and had to go that short i dont care its more important to satisfy the costomer even if she is only 8

i feel like yelling at them and grandmother but i cant do that it was very painful to see my girl so sad

A parenting question?

You can't yell at them and the grandmother. Most ADULTS KNOW that kids (especially 8 year olds) should not "Rule the Roost". There is no reason your grandmother or the hair salon should have listened to your daughter. First of all, the hair salon could have gotten into a LOT OF TROUBLE for listening to what the little girl wanted instead of the adult accompanying the little girl.

Imagine the opposite happened: The little girl's grandmother didn't want the girl to dye her hair red at the salon and told the salon not to do it - but the little girl told the salon to dye her hair red. Who should the salon have listened to - the grandmother/adult/guardian or the little girl!!!!! Do you see the point??

From now on, take your own daughter to the salon if you want your little girl to wear her hair her own way. That way, you can supervise. Again, the salon can't take orders from an 8 year old - they can only take orders from a responsible parent/guardian.

Do NOT assume your girl is mature just because she looks at herself in the mirror and wants to change her hairstyle. That is NOT an indication of maturity. Maturity is indicated by not crying your eyes out if you get a bad haircut, maturity is indicated by controling one's emotions, maturity is indicated understanding adult matters and handling these complex matters in an adult way, maturity is the appreciation of the complexities of financial situations and money.

For your daughter's sake, don't be so quick to label her as being "mature for her age".

A parenting question?

EVEN THOUGH I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOUR QUESTION IS, TRY TAKING THEM TO THE SALON TO GET THEIR HAIR CUT.

A parenting question?

Take your daughter yourself for a haircut %26amp; VOILA!

problem solved.

The grandmother WAS the customer, she was paying... so they did listen to the customer.

A parenting question?

maybe next time YOU should go with your kids to get there hair cut. At least then you will know what should be done. And besides...the girl is 8....I don't think she should be too worried about what she looks like.

A parenting question?

I don't see a question here.

Take your own kid to the hairdresser. Simple.

A parenting question?

Aww... just console her and assure her that her beautiful hair will grow back soon. I wouldn't go back to that salon. Next time... you should take her and watch when they cut her hair to ensure that it was cut the way she likes.

A parenting question?

I would be Anger also.I would Make a point to tell you Mother in law that you will take your Daughter to get her hair cut and that she should never have assumed that it would be OK to get her Granddaughter hair cut Short.You Need to nip this in the butt Now before she assumes other stuff is OK to do.

A parenting question?

I agree with you in that your daughter clearly knows what she wants and should get the haircut she asks for. You will need to go with her next time and find a hairdresser that listens to your daughter, make the hairdresser listen and do what is asked of her while you stay and watch her cut the hair, then keep the same hairdresser in the future.

A parenting question?

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I don't see a question in among your verbiage, but I will answer nonetheless. There are several good lessons to be learned from this experience. Some for you and some for your daughter.

1. Life occasionally hands us little disappointments. If getting a haircut she doesn't like is the worst thing that ever happens to her, she will be leading a charmed life.

2. If you want something done right, then do it yourself. You have seen what happens when you trust the grandmother to be in charge of the haircuts. Next time you'll just have to take 'em yourself.

3. Hair grows back. It's not that big of a deal. Look, sometime, into the cancer ward of a children's hospital, at all those innocent kids who have lost ALL of their hair to chemotherapy and other desperate cures, and crying over a bad haircut will seem pretty petty.

Hope you can put this behind you and have a nice Thanksgiving with your family.

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A parenting question?

To prevent this from happening, take them yourself next time......no use crying over spilled milk and be sure and try to teach your daughter practical ways to handle disappointments as well....this would be the perfect time to do that. Tell her that you know she's disappointed and tell her that some adults have a hard time trusting that an 8 year old would be as mature and decisive as she is (throw in a few compliments) and tell her that we will chalk this time up to a learning experience and do what needs to be done next time to prevent it.

A parenting question?

i'm a 100% in sync with you. happend to me once. her grand mom gave her a VERY low cut. i told her exactly how i felt and asked her to pls ask me before she does anything with MY girl's hair! Try buying your daughter a new doll. might cheer her up.

A parenting question?

I think what should be done here depends on whether the grandparents made the decision or if the hair stylist did.

If you have not already, I would probably talk with the stylist who did your daughter's hair and find out if that is what the stylist really said. DON'T be confrontational about it.

I remember one time when I was in college, going to a Regis hairstylist in the mall. I had about shoulder length hair and was pretty fond of it. I wanted to have it trimmed up just a little. She ended up cutting a lot off; her reason being that I had really bad split ends. Reluctantly, I conceded to her insistance, but Inside, I was pretty angry with her. I later realized she had my best interests in mind in doing what she did. Prior to me seeing her, I had tangled up hair; combing it every day was painful. The stylist also told me how to keep the problem from happening again, by choosing better hair care products. (At that time I was using Prell, which is basically like dishwashing liquid for hair)

I got over my resentment and realized that she was right. I was wrong, even though I was pretty upset at her. I learned that day that hairstylists should be considered experts at hair. Sort of like a mechanic is supposed to be an expert at finding and fixing problems with your car.

The hair will always grow back. So the stylistic problem will not be long term. Your daughter may be a little like me and realize that what was done to her was not so bad at it first seemed. Also, a few compliments from some of her peers will make all of her resentment go away.

A parenting question?

I understand your being upset. As a mother of three girls, I can tell you even if you are standing right there sometimes, you can't stop them from messing up their hair.

As bad as it is, I see it as a learning lesson though. It is just hair. Bad and stupid things happen and we have to deal. Crying and being mad and upset for a few minutes is okay but don't let her go over board. Learning to deal with disappointments and set backs is part of life.

Good Luck!